Minty Monday to you all, my little gingersnaps! Did you have a nice weekend? No really, I'll wait until you tell me.
*comes back 5 minutes later*
Well, I had a lovely, romantical weekend with Mr. G at some fancy shmancy hotel. I also had a 75 minute deep tissue massage at the hotel spa followed by a 75 minute facial. And you know what they do when you finish a treatment? They give you a complimentary glass of wine (Chardonnay or Cabernet) and some fresh grapes on a silver platter while you sit in the relaxation room. And... since I had two treatments, I got TWO glasses of wine. Did I mention there's a fireplace going in every treatment room? There's one in the relaxation room too. And in the changing room. And lobby. And by the hot tub. *shakes my head* And the hotel was very nice. Each room had a doorbell outside of it. It took a lot of restraint not to run through the hallways pushing every room's doorbells. #Reason325WhyPeopleCantTakeMeNicePlaces
Now let's get on to the news... A Clearwater woman told her daughter, while on her deathbed, that Grandma is in their storage unit. That's right. GRAMMY IS IN THE STORAGE UNIT. (for the past 17 years) Not that the granddaughter did anything about it... until the self-storage manager called to inform her that she'd missed several payments and the contents would be auctioned off. Then the granddaughter said, "No! You can't sell the contents!! My grammy is in there!!!" Okay, I'm paraphrasing, but she probably said something like that. Once the self-storage guy called police, they indeed found "Grammy" in a blue casket, in the self-storage unit. Seriously, how could the granddaughter not know about this before? Did grammy have a funeral? Apparently not. On second thought... that might not be a bad way to save some money after your loved one passes. Just remember to keep paying those self-storage fees!
Grandma Found In Storage Unit: Florida Police Say Woman's Corpse Held There 17 Years
When Grandma went to a better place, she probably had something a little more luxurious in mind.
A manager at a self-storage facility made a shocking discovery on Thursday after a customer revealed that her family had held their grandmother's corpse in a rented unit for approximately 17 years, investigators in Florida say.
Kevin McKeon, of U-Stor Self Storage in Clearwater, learned about the body earlier this week when he called a tenant to inform her that she was behind on payments, the Tampa Bay Times reports. McKeon informed the renter that the contents of the unit would soon be auctioned off.
The granddaughter, whose identity remains anonymous, told McKeon that he couldn't sell the possessions, because one of those items was grandmother.
"She called and said, 'My mother told me on her death bed that Grandma is in the storage unit. You can't sell our stuff,'" Joelle Castelli, a Clearwater police spokeswoman, told the Tampa Tribune.
Skeptical of the conversation, McKeon did not check the storage unit until Thursday. When he opened the door and saw a long blue casket, he immediately contacted the Clearwater Police Department.
In Reality "Star" news, former "Real Housewives of NY" star Cindy Barshop (who??) wants us (and PETA) to know her new line of luxury merkins will be fur-free. What's a "merkin"? Why it's a pubic wig. And she will be selling her line of merkins at her waxing salon named, "Completely Bare". Which makes me wonder... WHY are you getting waxed bare, and then getting a merkin to wear? Hey, that rhymes. I feel a song coming on, do you? I think I shall entitle it, "Merkins for Brazilians".
And now, for today's (texting) FAIL...
This would be a very good reason to double, then triple check who you are texting before you write something potentially embarrassing. Like the time when Jamie thought she was texting her husband and she was actually texting me. Remember that, Jamie? *wiggles eyebrows*
see more epicfails
And though this is a Parenting FAIL, it's a problem-solving WIN for the kids!
see more epicfails
Did you ever wonder what a Dormouse looks like when they're sleeping? Or maybe how they sound when they're sleeping? Do they snore, for example? Well today is your lucky day. Watch the video.
Hey, WTF?!! I guess that's one way to hold on, when you're riding the subway.
And that's all the time I have for today. I've got a great idea for starting your week off right... find a co-worker (or family member) and play a practical joke on them. Then report back. OR... tell me in the comments the best practical joke you've ever pulled on someone. If I get 10 stories from you, I'll share the best joke I pulled on someone that I've never shared publicly. Oh yeah... well what are you waiting for? Oh, and one more thing...
In the 1700s there was a woman who birthed 69 children. She completely holds the record for most children born to one woman. In total, she had 16 sets of twins, 7 sets of triplets, and 4 sets of quadruplets!
Out of the 69 children, 67 of them survived past their infancy. This information has been in circulation since the 1800s, and there have been doubts about how true the claims are. Nevertheless, the information presented was good enough for the Guiness Book of World Records to include this woman in their record books.
Kate Gosselin and the Duggar family have nothing on that lady!
**ATTENTION** Don't forget to head on over to Mommy Hates Chemicals for the latest review by Jamie & myself. Are you following us over there? If not, why not? I'm just saying... the more followers we have, the more likely we'll get our products FREE instead of having to buy them for review. I'm not above begging. I don't like buying chemical-free products I'll never use again! (since I'm the one who likes chemicals) Go on... "follow us" over there.