Wiggity Wednesday to you all, my little gingersnaps. In the news, an Alaskan man got stuck in a snow drift while driving and survived by eating frozen beer until rescuers could come. I think this can serve as an important lesson for us all. Keep an emergency stash of beer in your trunk in case you happen to be in a survival situation. It may just save your life. Beer good.
Clifton Vial, Alaska Man Stranded In The Snow, Survives By Eating Beer
Drinking beer isn't generally viewed as something that's good for your physical health.
While some studies have claimed that drinking beer may reduce the risk of heart disease, alcoholic beverages often contain a high amount of calories, and drinking alcohol "reduces the amount of fat the body burns for energy." These two factors, according the University of Rochester Health Service, can lead to the infamous beer belly and obesity associated health problems.
But, for Clifton Vial, beer may have actually saved his life -- or at least made waiting for rescuers a little less boring.
Vial, an Alaska man, found himself stranded in snow in remote Alaska with only a few cans of Coors Light to drink, the Anchorage Daily News reports.
According to the Anchorage Daily News, he was not prepared for the emergency. His cellphone didn't have any service nor did he have access to a a survival kit. Instead he had a few cans of frozen Coors Light.
The Anchorage Daily News also reports that he ended up stranded after heading off on a long drive.
In celebrity news, Alec Baldwin was kicked off a flight at LAX for playing Words With Friends. He says they were on the ground and the plane wasn't moving but the flight attendant insisted he turn his device off. When he refused, he was escorted off the plane. You know, I'm really sick of these celebrities acting like they are above the law and don't have to follow the rules that everyone else does. I bet he was also tampering with the smoke alarm in the bathroom. And taking more than his share of peanuts. Alec Baldwin, just who do you think you are? (oh and my Words With Friends name is "GSnaps", so let's play, ok?)
In douchebag news, Jesse James would like his old friends to know he's back to being the douchebag he always was before. In an apology to his fans he said, "I became a big shot and married some hollywood actress..."
Uh, Jesse. Stop. Talking. Please. Your foot is so far down your throat, it's about to come out your butt. You're making Mel Gibson look good.
And now, for today's FAIL. I think this person chose the wrong tattoo artist.
You know, while they're crossing out words, they might as well cross out "your" and write "you're*" above as well.
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And for today's WIN...
Hey, WTF?!! That's inappropriate use of body hair if you ask me. They should have some sort of law against that. Someone strap that man down and wax him before he can go out in public again. He's scaring the children. And me.
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And that's all the time I have for today. Grab yourself a six pack of beer and stick it in your trunk in case of natural disasters or unruly snow drifts. Or if you don't drink beer, grab some Dr Pepper. I'm pretty sure you can survive off that as well. Until tomorrow everyone...
You can have them, apparently, just not detonate them. I guess it kinda makes sense if you want to still have chances for superheroes to be created through some sort of radio active accident, but don't want to have to clean up the mess of a nuclear explosion.