Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Paritioners on a Pole

Willy Nilly Wednesday to you all, my little gingersnaps! Yay, we made it to hump day! You know tomorrow is only a day away. Just thought I'd remind you. In case you forgot.

In the news, a 92 year old Ocala, Florida resident believes her 53 year old neighbor Dwight is 'supposed to be her man'. Well, Dwight has a girlfriend. So when Helen came over to his house demanding a kiss, he told her to get the blankety-blank off his property. So Helen returned with a handgun (cause that's what Floridians do) and shot up his house and carport, narrowly missing Dwight. Helen was taken into custody, but is not swayed one bit by Dwight's rebuff or girlfriend.

Helen is also apparently skilled in the art of drawing eyebrows with a sharpie.

Source: myfoxfd

This is not the first or second or even third time I've posted a picture of Alexander Skarsgard eating at Joan's on Third in West Hollywood. A place that Mr. Ginger and I like to eat. WHY OH WHY ARE THEY NEVER THERE WHEN WE ARE??!! Cause you know I'd totally tackle one of those poprocksies that stake out the place and take a ninja pic of him for you guys. Okay, for me. But I'd share with you guys too.

Source: justjared

This just in... Sammy Hagar is telling the world he was abducted by aliens. sidenote: Do you capitalize "aliens"? I mean is "alien" a common noun and "Martian" the proper noun? HELP! My homeschool manual makes no mention of whether or not alien/Alien is a proper noun. Where's my coffee?

Oh yes... Sammy Hagar. I personally think Sammy Hagar was abducted by CRAZY. The same crazy that abducted Charlie Sheen.

Source: TMZ

Introducing... Pole Dancing For Jesus. A former pole dancer/stripper is now a dedicated church-goer who wants to teach other Christian women how to pole dance for Jesus. I'm not really getting where the "for Jesus" comes in, but they do pole dance to upbeat Christian music, which somehow seems uh... different.

You know what I decided to do? I'm going to start a group: "Animal Hoarders For Jesus". After all, animals are God's children (except for dogs), which is why I have 7 cats, 7 rabbits, 3 snakes and a fish. Who wants to join my group? We can listen to upbeat Christian music while we play with our pets.

Source: dlisted

Do you work in an office where someone keeps stealing your lunch out of the company fridge? This might be the solution for you...

Source: oddee

Hey, WTF??!! I'm guessing this was taken on St. Patrick's Day, but something tells me that's no Leprechaun.

fashion fail - I'm Feeling Not So Lucky Actually
see more Poorly Dressed

And that's all the time I have for you today. Today, do something unexpected for someone else you know. Doesn't have to be nice, just unexpected. Farting in an enclosed space counts as "unexpected". Until tomorrow, here's something I bet you didn't know...

Stuntman Evel Knievel broke more bones in his lifetime than any other person.

Some claim that Knievel broke EVERY bone in his body. Though this is not true, he did try his best to do so! Evel actually holds the Guinness World Record with 35 total broken bones, including all his ribs, both arms, his nose, even his butt bone! Because of all these injuries, Evel Knievel spent a total of 36 months in the hospital during his career.

-OMG Facts



  1. Really, Sammy? Aliens? I totally was on your side up until this point. Really? Uploading from your brain? Are you aware you are not a microchip? They must have been sorely disappointed with the half a megabyte they ended up with when the upload was complete.

    And you called Eddie Van Halen crazy? Really?

    Also...I love that the chick kept her hideous clear stripper heels.

  2. LMAO! Aliens, crazy old ladies and weird looking leprechauns...

    What the church goer?stripper forgot to mention is that Jesus is her neighbor that attends the same church...

  3. I would just like to point out that my husband would love if I pole danced for Jesus. As long as he could watch. I am sure he would be very, uh, reverent. In fact (and yes, Imma gonna go there) I think he would find it... uplifting!

  4. I love the 92 year old's Moxie...and her dementia.

    I think it's official, you can add "for Jesus" to anything. And I like her justification-she added "for Jesus" to help take the stigma from stripper poles. Uh, I think it's going to take a touch more than that.

  5. I heard about the 92 yr old lady on the radio this and wow. Is it bad I want neighbors like that. Make my days more
    The much did she have to drink to think she looked good?

  6. Graceling, you KILL ME!!! "uplifting"

  7. I'd like to address the capitalization issue.

    When at the beginning of a sentence (Aliens abducted Sammy Hagar and immediately regretted their decision.) aliens should be capitalized. Also, if you are referring to a specific race of aliens, such as the Plutonian Aliens, then capitalization is needed. That said, if you are referring to aliens in general or have no idea about their planet or galaxy of origin, there is no need to capitalize the word as it is still considered a common, although incredibly weird, noun.

    That is all. :P

  8. The Girl, thank you for confirming my suspicions re: the common noun status of "alien" vs. "Plutonian Aliens". Your very detailed answer rocks, and I shall add it to the Grammar chapter in our 5th grade homeschool manual.

  9. @Ginger FINALLY I get published! :P