Thursday, January 14, 2010

Smurf You

It's Spank and Ginger in the morning, The weather in Jasper, Georgia is 30 degrees with a low of 22 degrees. It's going to be cold as Hale out there! Traffic on the 405 is bumper to bumper, so today would be a good day to practice what you preach.

In the news, they now say quitting smoking increases the risk of diabetes by 70%.

source:BBC News

And research also shows that quitting smoking ONLY decreases your chance of getting cancer by 50%. So according to this, the scale tips in favor of smoking. *shakes head no*

So if you like eating sugar, you might just be better off smoking. The Spank and Ginger Show, where we guarantee the news will be unfair and unbalanced.

Fox-y News

Hey Spank, have you seen the movie Avatar yet?

Why no, Ginger, I have not.

That is too bad, Spank. Because after I saw it, I had an intense desire to move to Pandora and become one of the Na'vi. (the big blue smurfs)

*birds circling over my head*

ANYWAY, when I saw McDonalds/Avatar had a website where you can turn yourself into one of the Na'vi, I jumped on it.

Apparently they neglected to mention that it turns you into the inbred cousins of the Na'vi that ride the short bus.

sidebra with blueberry pie: Is that you?

blue sidebra with padding: YES it's me! And look at my freaky lopsided mouth!

Aw Ging... you seem so blue. Is everything okay?

No, everything is NOT ok, because I became Retardo Na'vi. But, I thought it would be fun to have some company in that inbred cousin tribe of mine by turning some celebrities into Na'vi.

Let's start with Na'northman:

WOW! Eric Northman really can pull anything off... and I really wish he would... pull anything off... my body... but, I digress... *coughs* Sorry. *blushing* Please, continue.

Yeah, I wouldn't mind making him my mate. So let's see what Na'Buffy would look like:

If she was one of the Na'vi, she'd be able to kick some serious military @ss.

Who's Buffy and why does she have such ginormous eyes?

*rolls eyes* I have not forgotten that you promised me you would watch the Buffy series with me one of these days.

One of those days is yet to come.

uh huh... I made more avatars, wanna see?

No. *snickers*

Well you're fresh out of luck, cause I'm not done! *sticks tongue out at you* I even turned your boy into one. I present Na'Jasper:

All I see are those lucious lips, even if he looks like he just ate Smurfette.

yeah, they didn't make his mouth all lopsided like they made mine. Maybe he belongs in the regular tribe. Maybe he's the one driving the short bus.

Jackson Rathbone is definitely in a league/tribe of his own.

But like Vanessa Williams, I saved the best for last. Na'Fillion:

Does he suffer from Have-no-lipititis?

What are you talking about?! He's freakin' perfect! I'm sure if he was my mate, his superior genes would balance out my inbred genes and we would have normal Na'vi children.

No, Ginger. They'd be blue and, worse still, they'd be blue with lopsided smiles, sans lips.

There's only one way to find out. *wiggles eyebrows*

BANG BAM said the lady.

and... that's all the time we have today, folks. Have a great day and we'll leave you with this parting thought...

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt"?

**In all seriousness, we at The Spank and Ginger Show are heartbroken by the current devastation in Haiti. Mr. Ginger, whose hobby is photography is offering a free pic in HQ digital format to everyone who donates $5 through his site. 100% of the proceeds will go to Red Cross Disaster Relief in Haiti. Check it out and spread it around:


  1. Hello there girlies!
    Love the blog. As always awesome and funny!
    I watched Avatar and I loved it. Will watch it again coming Wednesday in 3D. *grins*

  2. Love the new site! Great to hear from you again

  3. How does Eric Northman manage to look good as a blue thing? My first thought was, "Yeah, I'd do him blue." Uh... Nevermind.

  4. Na'Buffy can take MY Papa Smurf for a swing anytime she likes.


  5. Oh; and the Chicken thing? Could have gone seriously wrong.

    Much like the "squeezing the dangly thing under the cow and drinking the white stuff that comes out"

  6. Oh how I love you two! Thanks for cracking me up.

    And Spank - it makes me sad that you haven't watched Buffy yet. Just do it!!!

  7. I love Buffy! Spank you must drop everything you are doing and have a Buffy Marathon. We can even do a twitter/buffy watching party!

  8. you know what? you gals can have the Twi-boys. Northman is mine, dammit. blue, sideways, Sunday, whatever. ;)

  9. @Cari - what does it say about me that I read "Buffy Marathon" as "Barry Manilow" AND got excited.

    @Heather - We're friends. We should share Eric.

  10. Teehee. LOVE the Na'Fillion!! You guys are hilarious :P

  11. I would like to exchange links with your site
    Is this possible?